Jennifer Lopez has no taste.

Yeah, that’s right, I said it.

What Lopez does have, however, is often a scary prospect when it’s combined with a complete lack of taste: lots of money. When those two get together, you get J.Lo’s wardrobe, including her Zuhair Murad dress from last night’s 2012 Academy Awards: too shiny, too tight, too obvious. She’s trying so hard to look incredibly expensive that she and her pantyhose-sleeved dress just end up looking cheap. Not to mention that despite having a lovely body, Ms. Lopez is now a 42-year-old mother of two. I know that she’s going through a divorce and dating some crazy 20-something with a terrible tattoo, but that doesn’t mean that Lopez shouldn’t put her days of obvious boob tape behind her. Keep the boytoy, ditch the wardrobe. Someone needs to teach Jennifer about subtlety, or if she insists on remaining over-the-top, she needs to find a more interesting way to do it.

Say what you want about new American Idol host Jennifer Lopez – I always love it when she shows up to an event because she always goes whole-hog for her look. Over the top clothes, hair, makeup, shoes; I can’t even imagine what kind of clothing storage it would take to contain all of J.Lo’s meticulously assembled outfits, not to mention what an exhausting job her stylist must have.

Lopez showed up at the 2011 Met Gala in a striking red gown off of the Gucci Fall 2011 runway, and even though the flower shrug would probably be a distraction on most women, I think she’s doing an admirable job of working the look in all of its over-the-top glory. Keeping her accessories tonal and her hair out of site was the correct choice for a dress with such a strong presence.

I don’t pretend to know anything about new American Idol host Jennifer Lopez‘s daily routine. I’ve never been a Fly Girl-turned-movie star-turned-pop singer-turned TV host, so the intricacies of life for one such creature are a mystery to me. A mystery covered in makeup, hair spray and furs of various colors and origins, naturally.

I’m starting to think, though, that Lopez goes to bed just as we see her here – clutching a Christian Louboutin Sweet Charity Studded Shoulder Bag and wearing the studded Christian Louboutin Lucifer Bow Pumps to match. And naturally, Lopez is wearing a Herve Leger Bandage Dress under her fur, because J.Lo wears Leger like the rest of us wear J.Crew sweatpants. Not that I’m wearing those right now or anything…

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I, like Rachel Zoe, happen to love a white dress on a red carpet, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a tricky look to get just right. Most of the western world so closely associaties white, floor-length dresses with impending matrimony that it’s almost an impossible trap to escape, and only people with very strong personal style are advised to try it. Love her or hate her, Jennifer Lopez has enough cojones to make it work.

She recently attended a charity gala with husband Marc Anthony wearing exquisitely beaded white Georges Chakra Couture, and while I love the dress, it looks like the tulle train might actually be kind of a disaster. Perhaps it only looks like that because J.Lo has to keep pivoting to face photographers, but whatever the reason, she needs to get her hubby on train duty ASAP. And are those Christian Louboutin heels that I see under there? I guess that’s the upside of a tulle train – everyone can still see your shoes.

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Yep, it is official, Jennifer Lopez continues to wind up on my best dressed list. It seems like every event she attends she out does herself.

Last night at the 2010 Costume Institute Gala Jennifer turned heads left and right in her Zuhair Murad Spring 2010 Couture Gown. This gown was a perfect fit. It brought the glitz and the glamor a true beauty like Jennifer Lopez can pull off. Sure, anyone can put this gown on and wear it. But not just anyone can put this gown on and still shine herself. Jennifer rounded everything out with a Judith Leiber clutch.

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You know, if I have kids some day, I can only hope that my body will bounce back like Jennifer Lopez‘s has. I mean, let’s call a spade a spade here, she is gorgeous.

She’s been spotted around recently promoting her new movie, The Back-up Plan all over the place. I’ve seen some of her interviews and I swear, she looks as good promoting movies on television shows as she does at a red carpet event. Here, Jennifer Lopez graced the red carpet wearing Bottega Veneta Spring/Summer 2010 Gladiola Pourpre Cotton Stripe Dress, Cruise 2009/10 Oxydized Silver Hoop Earrings and Oxydized Silver Bangle to the Madrid premier of her new movie. Her super high Christian Louboutin pumps weren’t too bad either. All I know is that she looks great, mommy or not.

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Ok, I’m sorry, but did anyone else wonder what the heck Jennifer Lopez was wearing last night? I realize that the Oscars is a great event to push the fashion envelope a bit, but I always prefer flawless over fearless. It appears that Jennifer was willing to be fearless while her dress had many flaws.

Jennifer wore a Giorgio Armani Prive gown which seriously reminded me so much of glorified bubble wrap. I would have liked the gown a bit more if all that extra material was left off of the side. Jennifer carried an Armani Prive clutch, Cartier jewels and Salvatore Ferragamo satin pumps. Her makeup looks great and all of the accessories are fab as well, but that dress, she could have done much better with the dress.

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We can officially call the Stella McCartney Chain-Detail Tote in It Bag, right? I think so. We’ve caught celebs like Rihanna and Kate Hudson carrying it in the past few months, and that’s quite a few celebs for a vegan bag from a designer that isn’t know for her accessories.

And now that we’ve seen Jennifer Lopez with it, the bag may have officially jumped the shark. She’s not quite the fashion inspiration that she once was (Exhibit A: that shirt), not to mention that I vaguely remember her being part of some sort of PETA-endorsed celeb axis of evil or some such nonsense. The woman wears more fur than I can even comprehend, so as I did with Kim Kardashian, I’m forced to wonder whether or not J.Lo is aware that the bag is, in fact, not leather. Maybe she doesn’t care one way or the other, or perhaps that’s precisely why she appears to be wearing it with her gym clothes.

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Being the child of a famous person has to be kind of weird no matter who the famous person is, but I would think that being the child of someone like Jennifer Lopez would be even weirder. She has the reputation as a cold, calculating diva and perfectionist, so how would she be as a mom? Overbearing? Distant? Or maybe she’s a great mom with the ultimate closet in which a little girl could play dress-up?

It’s impossible to say, but I hope J.Lo hangs on to her clothes so that her daughter can inherit some awesome vintage pieces when she’s old enough to wear them. Heck, I’m still pissed that my mom went to a Who concert in the 70s and didn’t have the foresight to buy her unborn daughter a t-shirt, I can’t even imagine growing up to be the daughter of a filthy rich fashionista and realizing that she had given away so many great things that I could have had for free! So, I propose she starts putting aside things to keep for her daughter now, starting with her Zagliani Crocodile Puffy Satchel – exotics should ALWAYS be preserved for future generations.

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Why do celebs have so many nick-names? JLo/Jennifer Lopez/Jenny from the block has just as many nick-names as her one time boytoy, Sean P. Diddy Combs. Don’t even get me started with all of his nick-names. However, no matter what name she is going by at this point, she certainly looks gorgeous carrying the highly lusted after Valentino Bow Clutch. In fact, this blogger has lusted after the same clutch ever since I saw it (click here for my review).

In fact, I think Jennifer Lopez has close to impeccable style. Not only does she know about what is fashionable, but she’s also not afraid to try something new and different – queue the green Versace dress heard ’round the world. The gorgeous white dress she is wearing here isn’t nearly as edgy as the infamous green dress, but it is very form fitting.

Actually, so for fitting that I can’t help but comment on the bump she is sporting. And no, I am not referring to her rear. Is it just me or does she seem to look a little preggo? I mean, she is so tiny everywhere else, I can’t help but wonder. What do you think?

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Who else but Jennifer Lopez could pull off carrying a baby and a croc Hermes Birkin all at once? I’d be too worried that the baby would vom all over the Birkin, which would be pretty devastating. And, by the way, what a beautiful Birkin this is! The rusty orange color is equal parts shiny and subdued, if that makes sense.

But clearly, if the baby is Maximilian Muñiz, there is no problem. I mean, look at him! He looks like a dapper tiny golfer, fresh off the green. He probably has amazing manners. Anyways, La Lopez has demonstrated that traveling with babies is not hard at all. In appearance, anyways. But it probably is quite simple when you have a private jet and don’t have to go through security and take off both your shoes and your babies’ shoes. And that is probably the secret to how she’s got the diva look even on the tarmac.

Bag Jennifer’s Hermes Style via Hermes.com!

I feel like Jennifer Lopez has been out of the headlines for long enough that she gets a bit of a clean slate. A couple of years ago, I’m sure I would have had a lot to say about her and her purportedly diva-like behavior, but she has managed to stay married to her Skeletor of a husband and seems to have spent most of her time in the recent past caring for her twin babies.

As a result, I don’t have much vitriol for her, and also not much to gush about. She has reemerged recently and has looked pretty great – not overdone, not too glam. I wouldn’t guess that she recently turned 40, and we all know how difficult it is to age with any kind of grace in the Hollywood spotlight. So kudos to her on that, and also kudos on her bag selection – the Diane Von Furstenberg Stephanie Hobo. The way she’s wearing it emphasizes the casual chic attitude of her outfit, and it also gives the jeans-and-t-shirt look a pop of visual interest. Also, it sort of matches her hair.

Bag Jennifer’s Diane Von Furstenberg Style via ShopBop!